My mom   (Jean for those who knew her here) just had her first birthday since the last one where we nearly lost her. Last year on her birthday two aneurysms in her head ruptured, and we didn't realize it…she went days without treatment, and by the time she got to the hospital she had to be rushed to surgery. It was months of touch and go, and so many times doctors said she was gone, brain dead, as good as gone, lost cause. Between that and all the family drama that came with it, the fact that no one handled it well, and that some handled it very badly…it was an absolutely awful year for everyone.

When she was finally able to be brought home, it was not with the doctor's expectations that she would every walk or speak or be much of herself ever. She's done so much beyond anyone's expectations. Jean is very much Jean now, there is just a serious expressive aphasia issue. This is something that will never go away. She can walk, she can dress herself, she can do a lot of things, but her comprehension of language and sometimes the very world around her is a little (and sometimes quite a lot) off.

We're still incredibly grateful for what we have in her now. Most of us can understand her a majority of the time, enough to keep her happy, and when we don't understand her, she just tells us to bugger off and dismisses us with a flick of her hand…which is very Jean.

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It has been a very hard year. I can hardly even explain it…I don't think I will even try. So much bad came out of 2008 that I almost feel like the year was cursed. I'm just praying for a better 2009.


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